"He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm,
and carry them close to his heart, and shall gently lead those that are with young." Isaiah 40:11

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Fighting to Breathe again

Rachel had a very difficult 'heart spell' this morning.  There was no warning - she was just waking from a short nap.  I had just been having snack with the kids and telling them how overwelmed I felt about all the goodness in our life...we were opening Christmas cards/pictures from friends....What a rollercoaster of a morning.  I still feel shaky and exhausted - like I was the one that ran a marathon. We gave Rachel two shots of morphine this time, the whole thing lasted almost half an hour but it felt much much longer.  I held her and sang "Jesus Loves Me" to her and kissed her and cried.  Dave came home and brought a friend with him to watch our kids.  I don't know how I even managed to get a movie on for them with everything happening..I was walking around the house with my little girl who may be dying, having to answer my other kids demands...it's kind of sureal. 

We are packing up a bit early and moving to the Flames House this afternoon.  Thank-you for your prayers.

13 comments:

Noella said...

Praying for you.

Kathy and Carl said...

I'm sorry that you had such a roller coaster morning. My heart breaks. Keeping you constantly in our prayers.

Rachel Friesen said...

Oh, Kendra!
I'm going to be praying that when God does finally take Rachel, it will be in a moment of peace and beauty, not panic and chaos. I can just imagine what you went through this morning. I'm so sorry. Your family is on my heart.

Sharon said...

Kendra I love you so much. I was talking to my mom earlier today and we both expressed love for you. Supporting you in prayer every day... through frightening spells and shaky moments and autopilot and expressing appreciation for blessings and, well, through everything. My heart is full of love for you and Dave and your children. ~YES Jesus loves you/me. Always. All ways.

Don, Maxine, Carrie & Isabella said...

I have been following your blog for a few months now, a friend has been posting links on facebook. I am amazed at how you all live through each day. I often find myself praying for your family, for Rachel, for strength. I pray you find peace on Christmas, that Rachel has strong days, so that as a family you can celebrate, celebrate the season, celebrate Jesus and celebrate having Rachel with you for this special holiday. God bless you all.

Angela said...

Sending you great love friend, and praying for God's strength for all of you.

Anonymous said...

Hugs to all of you! L-lew

Anonymous said...

I do not know you but was told last February about your prayer request when a number of us were down in Louisiana on MDS. I have followed every post and my constant prayer for grace & strength in this very difficult time in your lives. No one can understand your pain but the all loving God. I am amazed on your deep honesty of feelings, the struggles and anger. That is a sign of a very very strong person. Continually in prayer for you, to hold onto your faith. Irene K

Kari said...

Our prayer are with you and for little Rachel. May the Lords peace be with you in all ways possible in these times.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry Kendra for you and for Rachel! As she is 'bravely living her life' she is so blessed to have such a loving and caring Mom like you. That 1/2 hour must of felt like an eternity.
I am with you in spirit.
Love Laura

Janet said...

Kendra,
I pray that Jesus will hold you & strengthen you.I see His love flowing through many people as I read the many comments.I pray you will get the rest when you go to The Flames House.What a blessing to know you can go there any time you need to..I love that song too."Jesus Loves Me"I use to sing that to our daughter too.It still touches my heart when I hear that song.Thank you for sharing that.
Much love & prayers.

Janet M

Anonymous said...

Kendra, I am so sorry that you guys have to go through this. Rachel is a beautiful baby and is very lucky to have you and David as parents. I can tell that you both love her so much. If there is ever anything you need please let us know. We would like to help in any way possible.
We will be praying for you and your family.
Angela krebs.

Sandi said...

Oh, Kendra - what that must have been like for you! I am praying for unimaginable peace and strength, for those times when it seems impossible. How I wish that I were closer and could give you a big hug. Know that we love you, are praying for you, and crying with you,
Sandi & Paul